people say ‘I’m Sorry’ and I Still Feel The Same

people say ‘I’m Sorry’ and I Still Feel The Same

I live a hundred million light years away from white people on this planet. I remember when I was about five, a white boy who lived next door to me took a hammer and smashed my fingers as I walked along the side of a fence between our houses. His mother stood on the back porch unflinching with her arms folded in front of her. There were no cell phones with video cameras. So, yes, in answer to any queries, I’m sure it happened. What did I do to provoke him. you ask. What, under the sun, could I have done to deserve that?

This is my America, A hundred million light years away from whiteness.

The founding fathers, all but one, owned slaves in order to amass fortunes. They considered my people chattel. In the same breath, these founding fathers mouthed and penned the Constitution. Most Americans from the dominant culture can’t see the founding fathers as anything other than heroes, and me an ungrateful asshole because I consider them assholes.

I don’t have the capacity to have conversations with people whose eyes are sealed so tight. I wouldn’t have any energy left to live.

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